


Can't Sleep Alone

by NoOneKnowsIWriteThis



Category: Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Genre: Friends With Benefits, Friends to Lovers, Hopeful Ending, M/M, Melancholy, Season/Series 06, Set during the Dominion Invasion arc on the Defiant, referenced canon character death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-17
Updated: 2018-05-17
Packaged: 2019-05-08 08:44:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,170
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14690532
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NoOneKnowsIWriteThis/pseuds/NoOneKnowsIWriteThis
Summary: When you could die at any moment, why go to bed unaccompanied? And why not take a chance you've denied yourself for years?-“Garak, were you worried about me?” Julian asked. “Is that why you’re here? To make sure I was alright?”Garak stopped and looked at Julian over his shoulder. “My dear, is it any surprise that I wanted to see with my own eyes that you were safe?”





	Can't Sleep Alone

The crew was well into celebrating the success of their first mission under Jadzia’s command when Julian spotted him. Hovering just outside the doorway to the Defiant’s mess hall was Garak. Garak had been pulled from the Defiant at the same time Sisko had been. Starfleet thought the former Obsidian Order operative’s knowledge of Cardassian codes could prove invaluable, and as such they wanted to keep him away from the front lines.

 

Julian slipped away from his friends and made his way through the crowd towards the Cardassian. “Garak,” he greeted happily once he drew close.

 

“Doctor,” Garak replied with a smile.

 

“I didn’t expect to see you here,” Julian admitted. “You never came to these celebrations before.”

 

“I was taking a stroll to clear my head from codebreaking when I noticed that the Defiant had returned. I thought I’d see how my old shipmates were doing.”

 

“The mission went off without a hitch and only a few minor injuries that have already been treated,” Julian replied happily. “Can I get you something to drink? Nog’s got Saurian brandy.”

 

“No thank you, doctor. I’m quite finished here. It was lovely seeing you.” Garak started to walk down the hallway, but Julian followed him.

 

“Garak, were you worried about me?” Julian asked. “Is that why you’re here? To make sure I was alright?”

 

Garak stopped and looked at Julian over his shoulder. “My dear, is it any surprise that I wanted to see with my own eyes that you were safe?”

 

“Garak,” Julian whispered with wonder as he stepped to his friend’s side. He placed a hand on Garak’s shoulder and didn’t miss the way that Garak’s eyes widened at the contact. They stood still for a moment, intimately close, then Julian issued an invitation. “Would you like to come back to my quarters?”

 

Garak looked at him curiously and said “How much have you had to drink?”

 

“Not much,” Julian answered honestly. “I was planning to wind up in bed with  _ someone  _ by the end of the night.”

 

“Ah,” Garak said bitterly. “ _ Someone.  _ Anyone.” He didn’t pull away, but his eyes were full of disdain and disappointment.

 

“We’re in the middle of a war, Garak. Don’t resent me because I’d rather not spend my nights alone when I could die any day.” Julian started to pull away. “If you’re not interested, I’ll find someone else.”

 

“I never said I wasn’t interested, my dear doctor,” Garak countered, keeping Julian in place with a hand around his waist. “But perhaps we should go to my quarters instead. They’re a bit farther away, but they do have the advantage of privacy.”

 

Julian blinked in surprise. He’d expected that Garak would dismiss him out of hand after his previous comment, but he quickly recovered and told Garak to lead the way.

 

They were silent on the way to Garak’s quarters, neither one of them willing to say anything more and risk shattering the moment.

 

As soon as the door slid shut behind them, the two immediately came together, frantic with passion and eager to resolve the years of stolen glances and flirtatious bickering. The first round was frenzied and desperate, appropriate for a joining caused by the imminent threat of death. The second round was slow and tender, a coupling more suitable for the culmination of their mutual pining.

 

That night Julian fell asleep, exhausted and sated, while wrapped in Garak’s arms.

 

The morning after started off slightly tense. Both of them were clearly unsure exactly where they stood until Julian asked if Garak would be interested in repeating the experience. Garak said yes.

 

They fell into a pattern. Every time Julian and the Defiant returned to base, Julian would slip away to find Garak and the two would reunite in a tangle of limbs, breathy gasps, and desperate moans.

 

At long last the Defiant headed out to retake Deep Space 9. Garak and Julian met for a tryst in the medical supply room they’d bickered in a few short months prior.

 

That night, Julian returned to his quarters on the station, exhausted from celebrating and nearly asleep on his feet. He’d barely managed to pull off the jacket and scarf from his Battle of Britain costume when the door chimed. He went over to answer it and was surprised to find Garak on the other side.

 

“I hope I’m not intruding, doctor,” Garak said, clearly uncomfortable.

 

“Not at all. Did you need something?” Julian asked, curious.

 

Garak looked away. His voice dropped to a low murmur. “I’d rather not spend the night alone. It’s been a...trying day.”

 

Wordlessly, Julian stepped aside, expecting to be pulled into an embrace or dragged to the bedroom. Instead, Garak simply stood in the middle of the room, eerily still.

 

“Garak?” Julian prompted quietly.

 

“Ziyal.”

 

That one name was all Garak said, but it instantly sent Julian's mind into overdrive. “If-if you want to end this, that's fine. I don't want to stand in the way of your happi-”

 

“She's dead,” Garak said simply, cutting off Julian's rambling.

 

“Oh.” Julian blinked, more than a little shocked. “I'm sorry.”

 

“Julian,” Garak turned to face Julian as Julian's heart stuttered. Garak rarely called him by his name and had never done so outside of when they were intimate. “Help me to not feel alone and unloved tonight.” Garak’s expression was one of loss, but seemed muted, almost distant.

 

Julian forced back the confession of love that threatened to spill from his lips. This was neither the time nor the atmosphere in which to say such things. Instead, he asked “What do you want me to do?”

 

Garak answered not with words, but with actions. He strode over to Julian and roughly pulled him into a strangely soft kiss. The odd mix of roughness and gentleness continued as Garak nearly ripped the clothes from Julian’s body, but was exceedingly careful and tender in his caresses. Julian attempted to return the attention in kind, being firm and decisive in his actions that were meant to position or guide Garak, while being soft and sweet in those actions meant to show his affection and love.

 

When they were finally finished for the night, Julian gently cradled Garak against him as they drifted off to sleep.

 

Julian was awoken the next morning by Garak shifting about in the bed. Garak was sitting, preparing to stand, when Julian wrapped his arms back around Garak’s waist and held him lightly in place.

 

“You don’t have to go,” Julian murmured, his head leaning against Garak’s back.

 

“Your concern does you credit, my dear,” Garak replied, “but I’m alright now. You don’t have to worry about me.”

 

Julian tightened his grip around Garak’s waist. “I’d like you to stay,” he confessed quietly.

 

For a moment, Garak showed no sign that he’d heard, then he lay back down and slid back into place alongside Julian, and the two fell asleep once again. When they properly awoke later, it was with a sense of optimism towards their entwined future.


End file.
